Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Wouldn't It Be Nice

Time for another edition of STUFF THAT BUGS THE CRAP OUT OF ME. I know I’m going to sound cranky, but I don’t care. Things are not going well, and I think a little ranting will make me feel better. I need to complain a bit, and this is where I’m choosing to do it. Maybe tomorrow I’ll put up a list of things that make me smile. Or not. Either way, here are some things that are currently bugging the crap out of me.

Scary commercials. I don’t go to see scary movies. I don’t like them. My life is scary enough without monsters and demons and crazed chainsaw murderers. I don’t mind hearing about scary stuff, I just don’t want to FEEL it, with the scary music and the graphic violence and everything. WHY, then, must there be a commercial for a terrifying horror movie on TV every 5 minutes? If I was watching a scary TV movie, I might expect a scary commercial or two, but when I’m watching Burn Notice? I even saw ads for Drag Me To Hell during a Lifetime movie. Really, marketing people? Your research really shows that people who watch Love’s Enduring Whatever also enjoy a terrifyingly bloody horror movie? Who knew? I guess I’ve outgrown my demographic.

People using cell phones during a movie. I went to a movie recently, and I was really looking forward to it. Since I’m pinching pennies, I don’t go to the movies much and I was planning to have a fabulous time. I arrived just as the lights went down, and for a moment I couldn’t see where I was walking. I needn’t have worried, however, since 75% of the teenagers in the room were texting, and the combined light from their cell phones lit up the room plenty. Once the movie started, I expected it to stop, but it never really did. And every single time, my eye was drawn to the sudden bright light. SO annoying. Who are they texting? Each other? I wanted to shriek at them that I managed to get all the way through my teens and half my adulthood without a cell phone - maybe they could take a break for an hour and a half.

Online applications that take hours. A lot of jobs require online applications these days. Sometimes they’re pretty basic: name, address, phone, attach your resume and cover letter. Sometimes they require you to fill out an online resume form, in which you have to basically retype everything, including job history, which is a pain, but whatever. SOME of them, however, want to ask you questions. LOTS and LOTS of questions. I actually had one that required 150 questions. I’m not kidding, either. The first 60 of them were variations on the ‘how much do you agree/disagree with this statement’ thing, with statements like ‘I often struggle with my work’ or ‘I like to be in constant contact with my supervisor.’ Then there was a long section with word problems: “What is the next number in this sequence: 100, 52, 28, 16, 10” or “Bob, Carol, Ted and Alice went to dinner with Dopey, Grumpy, Sleepy and Doc; the women can’t sit next to each other; Doc sits by Bob, Sleepy sits on a corner next to Carol, and Ted and Dopey sit across from each other. Which chair does Alice have?” Then they finished up with a personality test where I had to rate myself on levels of energy, honesty, intelligence and general going-postal-ness. TWO and a HALF HOURS. Really? REALLY? To work at your lousy chain store? I don’t care if I was applying for a management job. This should NOT be the initial screening tool.

Inconsiderate people everywhere. People who don’t care about anyone other than themselves. Who randomly stand in your way at grocery stores without checking to see if they’re blocking someone, Who pull out in front of you in traffic and then go super slowly. Who drop things and leave them there. Who make comments like, ‘you must not be trying that hard’ when you tell them you’re still unemployed. Or they say ‘are you still harping on that?’ when they hear that you are continuing to hope to hear from your birth mother. Please, God, however depressed or cranky I get, never let me become one of those people. Please make sure I always care about the other people on this planet, whether I know them or not. And, God, while you’re at it? Please keep me from running them over in my car, even when they bug the crap out of me.


Evansmom said...

Things that make me cranky? That's easy - the things that make you cranky because I want you to be happy.

If there is anyone you need taken out, just give me a call. I now know a few basic karate moves.:)


Melissa said...

I feel your pain about the job search. My husband has been out of work since June 16 and still no unemployment. He has applied everywhere....even as far away as San Diego!! I too have been searching for work. But no one wants a person who hasn't worked for the past 4 1/2 years.

I hope things start looking up for you soon!

Becca said...

ayyyyy people suck. I can't believe people say things like that to you about unemployment and your birth mom!!! when they got back up off the floor, did they apologize??? man!

Eternal Lizdom said...


c3 said...

Oh boy. What a great list of annoyances! You completely deserve a chance to vent, and I hope it helped!

Mrs4444 said...

Wish I could take you out for a treat. Is it at least sunny there today??

kim-d said...

Oh, I so feel your pain. I am completely impressed that your list was as short as it is; if I got going on my list, I would probably bring Blogger down!

I would be more than happy to come there and run people over with my car for you. I figure, since I'm so good at avoiding running people over, I can also be good at NOT avoiding running people over! :) I would start with the people who said those awful things to you. Whoever they are, I'm sort of hoping that is the last chance you will give them to be so rude to you. Who needs it; as if life isn't hard enough!

I'm glad we had this chat! :) :)

Robin said...

i feel you on all of them. in fact, i believe i could add to the list...considerably.

ignore 'em when you can and kick 'em when you can't!

and btw - i know this won't help even a bit but you know it's not you, right? the job market is shitty all over....something will turn up eventually. keeping my fingers crossed!

Reddirt Woman said...

I'll get down behind those people that you need taken out while Evansmom karate chops them and they fall over me. Then I will sue them for falling on me, the jury will award me outrageous sums of moolah and I'll split it all between us and you won't have to worry about the freakin' job searches.

How's that sound to you?

Mary Ellen said...

HEY! All you guys who are offering to come beat up/run over/karate chop the people who bug me are twisted.

I like the way you think.

Odette said...

Oh man I hear ya!

I too hate scary movies and I hate their previews! Arg some people don't want to be scared!!!!

People on their cellphones are just frustrating.

I HATE ONLINE JOB APPLICATIONS! Yours tops my list of crappy ones though! Wow 2 + hours? I would have given up.

Sarah Laurence said...

I hate the light of cell phones during a performance too. People think it’s okay to text, but it isn’t.

Good luck with the job search.

And look on the bright side – the weather has been better lately. We are due for TWO gorgeous weekends in a row.

jojo said...

spot on! take care ME, I've had you on my mind a lot a good way.;p

Joni said...

I can seriously relate to the bottom three...and I could probably add a few more! Hope this was a good way to for that happy list!

Elenka said...

Now listen, M.E.,, you, YOU have a great sense of humor, even when you are venting. I look forward to checking your blog, and am a little disappointed when you haven't posted for a while. Then I worry about you, hoping all is ok. (That is NOT a sarcastic remark to make you post more often, no, you can do whatever you want.) The point is, you are a person that I don't even know yet you bring some laughter into my life. And that's a good thing. I know you like to laugh, too.
I have no words of advice because what the heck do I know, but I know one thing....your birth mom is missing out on something wonderful. Good luck to you.

claudia said...

I hear ya on all of that.
I guess I am a real bitch. When people do or say something I think is rude, I call them on it. And then stare them down. Try it...I think you'd like it. I always walk off snickering to myself.
As for the kids and their damned texting...AAARRRGGGHHH! Their parents should be made to spend a day locked up in a room with them to see just how irritating it is, because I know darned well the parents don't get it. I had to quit going to the movies because of anxiety attacks brought on by too much noise and too many people.
I will come and get in peoples faces for ya if ya want. I need a little vacation...I'll be right there.
Oh! One of my co workers is going to be somewhere up at the northernist part of Maine in week or two. I told her to say hi for me!
I am praying that things get better for you soon!
Love Ya!

Anonymous said...

When scary commercials come on I shut my eyes, cover my ears and say 'lalalalala'. Seriously.

Caution Flag said...

I think your list is very controlled. We discovered the on-line app thing, too. Yikes. What a pain!

I am still praying for you Mary Ellen.

AirmanMom said...

Inconsiderate people are definitely my #1 crank! Can't we all just get along?
I'll remain a prayer warrior for you!

Sue said...

I am so with you on the commercial deal!!! I am watching tv with my kids and there are inappropriate commercials on all the time. Some are scary, some are suggestive, some are stupid. I am beginning to like taping shows and blasting through the commercials more and more!
Feel better!

Laura ~Peach~ said...


American in Norway said...

O h I hear you girl!... I was just thinking about doing a post about shit that bugs me... but not sure everyone wanted to hear me go on & on about my MIL.... LOL... she is bugging the crap out of me! : )

Vegas Princess said...

Every single thing you mentioned I have issues with too. Unfortunately I don't have the restraint to not say anything back. I have to work on that.