She called. Yesterday, late afternoon, she called Hallie and denied everything.
Hallie called me afterwards, and told me what she said. And I said, "she's lying."
Some of the details that she told Hallie did not jibe with facts that I have discovered through various records checks (marriage & death records, the obituary that I think is of my grandfather, and others). So I called her. I can't believe I did it, now that I think about it, but I just picked up the phone and called.
When she answered, I told her a little bit about what I was doing (searching for information) and she again denied everything. But when I pressed her on some of the facts, she got very flustered. EXTREMELY flustered. And suddenly remembered that she was late for an appointment. She said, "I just can't talk to you anymore about this right now" and then she was gone.
I think it's her. I really do. But she's obviously not ready to deal with me or the situation. To be fair, as several of you have pointed out (and as Hallie keeps saying), I've had a lot of time to prepare for this. I've been working towards this, waiting for this, dreaming and praying for this for a long, long time. She's had about 24 hours.
Still, I'm absolutely crushed. I'm trying not to be, and I feel stupid for being so hurt. I knew all along how this could go. But it's how I feel. I wasn't even going to post - Hallie said you all would understand - but you've been so amazingly supportive to me, and I wanted you to know what's going on.
I'm not going to give up, but I need some time to regroup and make a new plan. I feel really crappy, and I've got a migraine coming on - my first in over a year. Thanks for all the incredible comments. I appreciate each and every one of you more than you could ever know.