Friday, January 23, 2009

A little of this, a little of that

I've got so much going on right now, it's impossible to put coherent thoughts together. It's not going to get better for the next couple of days, either. I have a house full of guests arriving today, and they'll be with us for the weekend. I also have about a dozen crises to deal with, ranging from the ridiculous to the sublime. It's a good thing I'm a renaissance woman and can handle everything thrown at me with grace and humor. (that statement, ironically, was itself a joke, in case you couldn't tell!)

There's a big dog sled race happening this weekend, and this time it's near my house - only about 30 minutes away. The good news is: CHEAPER! No motels, no expensive restaurant meals, no huge travel expenditures. It's also better when the dogs can sleep at home. They rest better in their own individual spaces, rather than in the truck, where they share with another dog.

The (sorta) bad news is that I end up hosting people at my house, and it sometimes is a lot of people, and I have to feed these people (and find beds for them). The boys are racing, though, and that makes them very happy. If anybody reading missed the part about us having a kennel full of racing sled dogs, you can read about it, and see photos here.

I'll be pretty busy over the next couple of days - at the race both Saturday and Sunday - but I'm going to try to take pictures with my new camera, and if they turn out well at all, I'll post some of them here.

To update you on the whole birthmother thing, I don't have a lot to report. I wrote her a letter. Actually I wrote several letters. It's harder than it seems it would be, to write a letter to someone you believe is the person who gave birth to you, even though she denies it. Some of the letters ended up sounding accusatory or bitter, and that's the last thing I want to do. One of them seemed a little whiny, and another one a bit too needy. I may be overthinking the whole thing, but I can't help it. This letter could possibly be the one thing that changes her mind and convinces her to reach out to me, even just a tiny bit. Or it could scare her away forever. That's a lot of pressure on a letter. I want it to be just right.

One last note. I have to thank you (again) for all the amazing comments. I went back and re-read some of the comments from right after I made the call - when I was the most despondent - and I realized you made some really good points. Your support is fantastic, and your advice is pretty darn good, too. It's a wonderful bloggy world, and I'm glad you take time to stop by here. It makes me smile, and that's worth a lot.

26 comments:

Sue said...

You must post some pictures of the race! Hopefully it won't be too too cold. Or maybe that is good for sledding with dogs?

I have to tell you, I retold your birth control story to 3 of my girlfriends while at a bar last night. God, that is a funny story! That would have been a great Seinfeld episode!

Maybe all your company will take your mind off your birth mom for a few days. Good luck to the boys!

Wonderful World of Weiners said...

If you need to hide out, you know where we are. We have plenty of extra space!! And Mr. Chompers misses you!!

H

Liz said...

I cannot tell you how EXCITED I am to find out that you have sledding dogs!! I'm one of the rare people who don't have a kennel or any investment in the sport but I've been dogsledding!! It was a loooong time ago (freshman year of high school). In upper Minnesota over spring break. A week out in the wilderness, trekking about with dog sleds. Camping and all that jazz. Very awesome experience. Nothing better than a cold, crisp night with the Northern Lights and some howling dogs and echoing back wolves!!

Midwest Mommy said...

Wow, you do have a busy weekend! Can't wait to see pics.

Under the Influence said...

Have a great weekend. Enjoy the company but don't work too hard!

blessedmomto7 said...

I have to see pictures of dog-sledding. My kids would LOVE to see them! Please post as soon as you can :)

Alice said...

I didn't know you had sled dogs!!!! How cool is that??? I hope you guys have a fantastic weekend. And I hope you take lots of pictures!! And if you're looking for post material...maybe you could tell us a little about raising these dogs and the racing??? Sorry to sound ingornant, but I'm in Georgia. We have hunting dogs down here, but I don't think we have any sled ones. :)

AirmanMom said...

ME...it sounds as though you are in for an exhilirating weekend...do yourself a favor and simply get lost in it!
My prayeres are with you!

~AM

claudia said...

I didn't know you had sledding dogs! How cool is that?!? I think you may know that I love dogs of all kinds.
As for the letter. You're doing good withthat, keep at it, one you write will pop out at you as the one that wants to be sent!
Have fun and good luck this weekend. I want to hear all about it...how fun!

justlori2day said...

Cant wait to hear results and see pictures!

I know I told you before that my cousin and his wife are Ititarod racers, so I have found myself LOVING sled dogs and racing!

They are running the John Beargrease this weekend - fingers crossed all goes well this season - last year Jen was slammed into a fence and tore her hand up at JBG, and they lost 2 dogs to a snowmobile accident at the Iditarod just a few weeks later (but Jen came away with Most Inspirational racer, and Blake set a new record Time for a purebred Siberian team). Blake is running the Iditarod again this year.

GOOD LUCK! Lots of booze will make all the people feel as though they are not even there!

BTW, I have reread your BC story a few times and it just cracks me! Seriously, it should be sold to someone! Maybe some of the funds you make could help Hallie replace here ceiling!)

Laura ~Peach~ said...

the race sounds cool enjoy it and have fun with all the company and hard work taking care of them...

On the letter thing... IT is HARD so hard to write and get the emotion correct...I was thinking that maybe asking some of the questions might be a good way to get a response even if she does not want to meet maybe a letter with the most important (to you) questions might give her the ability to answer without feeling threatened or scared... I do recall one thing I wrote in my letter over and over... was that I was grown and not searching for a mommy and daddy that I was searching for me and that I would not cross any boundaries they set... I guess I lied in that however because they absolutely did not want me to meet my mothers family but, I did and they wanted to meet me too... but the reason they did not want me to meet them or know them was because then the lies would all come out and they did..., sigh there is never an easy answer is there...
anyway thinkig of you all the time :) Have a great weekend.
HUgs Laura

for a different kind of girl said...

Enjoy your weekend. It sounds like it's going to be a busy one, but maybe if you're able to go with the flow of it, it'll be relaxing for you and you can set aside the letter writing thing for a bit and be refreshed and such when you come back to it. But most importantly, have fun!

kim-d said...

Oh, ME...forgot to tell you. I decided this would be a good weekend to visit and my plane gets in at 7 tonight. BWAHAHAHA!

I'm just so glad to see a post from you, and I'll be really excited to see pix from the upcoming weekend. I clicked back on the link and took another look at the boys and the dogs; still SO cool!

Let me know when you're ready to have our little two-person "Blind Faith" book club meeting. :) Ready to discuss as soon as you are.

And last but not least, I would TOTALLY do the same thing with the letter! And even when you do manage to get the letter JUST right, then you will have to wait until the time is JUST right to send it. I have an e-mail folder titled "Drafts" that is home to FIVE items, all of them send-button-ready. The oldest one was written in 2006, but what I covered in it is still valid. And my whole point in telling you this is, well...I just understand that everything has to be "right" in your mind. I really do think I get it. As I say all the time, here for ya all the time.

Oh and also. Who designed diaphragms anyway. I think, based on long-ago antics of my own AND your story, they are the devil's work. BWAHAHAHAHA.

Becca said...

aaah it keeps eating my comments!

I said good luck on the race, hope your boys do well.

And send a letter, any letter, just get it started and see what happens

(and also, I want to see pics of your dogs, to see if they are as mutty as our Alaskan sled dogs or if Northeastern dogs are hoity toity and pretty)

Odette said...

YAY Doggies! Hope everything goes well with the race! I have always been curious about that sport, like do you treat the dogs like we treat our horses (like family!) or is it more like working dogs? What do you do with them after they get too old to race? It's so interesting!

I understand your desire to have your letter be just perfect, but maybe you're too critical of yourself and maybe you should get someone else to read them for you. (Although you probably already have...)

Have a great crazy weekend! :)

katy said...

Have a good time this weekend. It may be the break you need and then you can come back to letter writing and start anew.

Robin said...

sounds like fun.......enjoy it!

jojo said...

take some time out this weekend and just enjoy the dogs...take a deep breath and know it will all come toghether and it will happen in the right place at the right time...your thoughts will all be there and the letter will be all you need. Thinking of you ;)

Just Joni said...

This is just fascinating to me and would love to see actual pictures of the race...I've never seen anything like that (outside the movies)...could be because I live in California...good luck writing your letter. Live with all of them for a few days and your heart will settle on the "right" one. Have a really fun weekend!

Liz said...

I've given you an award over on my blog!

My Metabolic Rate is Stuck said...

WOW! SLEDDING DOGS! They are amazing! Let us know more!
Have a great and safe and fun weekend!

kim-d said...

Hi ME. Just wanted to let you know I'm thinking of you this Saturday evening, and hope you're having a good time!

Tonjia said...

I had no idea that you guys had sled dogs! This is so cool!

I would love to see pics of this weekends race, and to hear all about it.

I hope the house guests dont make you work too hard.

Reddirt Woman said...

I don't know how I missed the post about the boys and the dogs. Do you ever get out and run them? I keep telling my girls that if we ever get snow here they can pull me around on a cardboard box, but they just look at me like 'what you talkin' 'bout, Willis?'. They would be more likely sitting on the cardboard with me pulling them. I hope you have great fun this weekend with your boys and the race.

Helen

Reddirt Woman said...

BTW come check out my give-away...

Shellie said...

So, I just got caught up on the month here. I'm not finding anytime at all to read blogs and barely manage to post, but I was riveted catching up on all you have been through. oH, and the diaphragm story? Too good! I died laughing. But as for the big topic, I just wish it could be different. I do agree, she needs more time to think about it. She probably has many fears. Let it stew a bit and keep thinking and praying about it, and writing letters till you feel good about one, then send it. If you can show you have thought about what this could mean to her and try to assuage her fears and then show what you hope to find out, hopefully she will come around.I'd at least tell her something about yourself and your life, and thank her for giving you that. Send a few pictures. Who could resist you after that? Consider yourself virtually hugged!